Monthly Archives: August 2012

Me, Myself and I: An Epiphany

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Last Saturday, I decided to go to the mall. I had every intention of running in and quickly getting out. I did what I always do. I went into the parking garage, drove up to the fifth floor and quickly found a parking by the entrance.  I thanked the Lord for a good parking, got out of my car and proceeded into the mall. I had to pass the movie theater in order to get to the escalator. I noticed a few people buying tickets and I was a little surprised because it was only 10am. I thought; “who goes to a movie this early?” Apparently, many people do. Just before I got to the escalator, I heard Holy Spirit say, “Go and buy a movie ticket.” That sounded ridiculous to me! “Alone?” I thought. Why would I go to a movie and sit by myself? How absurd…..or was it?

There I was, Me, Myself and I, standing at the ticket counter. “One ticket for  ‘Sparkle’ please.” I looked around to see if I knew anyone. Who knows, maybe I would run into a friend and sit with her or maybe I was just hoping that no one I knew would see me alone at a movie. I didn’t want anyone assuming that my husband (who was spending time with our sons) and I were fighting or that I had become a pitiful person with no friends (I am so dramatic!). The attendant handed us (Me, Myself and I) the ticket. I thanked him, went to the concession stand and bought a pretzel and an ice tea. I gathered myself and walked into the theater all alone, like a professional movie goer.

it was only half full so I had a pretty good choice of seats. I went about half way up and chose a seat close to the aisle. I felt a little awkward but, I got comfortable and waited for the movie to begin. While I waited, I had a little discussion with the Lord (Abba):

ME:“So, why did You want me to come into a movie alone?”

ABBA: “Are you alone? I’m here with you.”

ME: “I know. You’re always with me.”

ABBA: “I Am always with you and I enjoy our time spent together.

I want You to enjoy our time as well, but you have to learn to

enjoy ‘YOU’ the way I enjoy You.”

That short conversation really made me think. Why had I always felt negatively towards doing things by myself? Was it because I didn’t like who I was or was I subconsciously avoiding realities that I was afraid to face? I realize that it was a little of both. I have shared with you in previous blogs that I’m going through a process of improvement in my life. Before anything can improve, you have to know what to work on. In order to do that, all the junk must be exposed. I began to converse with myself (not out loud, of course!):

ME: “Okay, there’s a first for everything and today is our (Me, Myself and I) first time alone at the movies.

We can choose to make the best of it or fret over it.”

MYSELF:  “What if this is a sad movie and you begin to cry? What if it’s a funny movie and you laugh out loud?”

I: “Well, I guess that would only be proof that you are okay. If it’s sad, it’s okay to cry and if it’s funny,

it’s okay to laugh.”

As simple as it may sound, it was my epiphany. I AM OKAY. Being okay may not sound like anything special but it can grow into something special. So it has been decided that only with time by MYSELF, getting to know ME,  will become who ABBA created me to be….more than okay, SPECIAL!

Hey, are you wondering how the movie went? I had a wonderful time! I laughed and I cried. I felt great being with myself and knowing that the Lord was encouraging me to enjoy ME time. It will not be the last time I make time for ME, MYSELF and I. Maybe next time, I’ll go to a restaurant or have a picnic on the beach.

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.”  2 Corinthians 5:17

 

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Movies In My Mind

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When I was in elementary school I always got in trouble for daydreaming. I would sit and stare into space and imagine all kinds of things. In my mind there were reels of movies playing and I was the star. Although, as a young girl I did most of my daydreaming at the wrong times, I believe it was and still is a blessing that I am able to use my imagination to build vivid pictures in my mind.

These days, my imagination is focused on things above. In other words, I spend a lot of time imagining the things I read in the bible or hear preached from the pulpit. I always see myself talking to the Lord. The two of us sitting by a beautiful lake, sun shinning, birds singing and the colors of the landscape are more brilliant than I have ever seen before. My imagination takes me walking on streets of gold and dancing on green, green grass. I imagine seeing my grandmother, no longer sick but full of life and laughter. All these scenes that play in my mind are there to encourage me. They are what I hope for and what I look forward to.

Don’t get me wrong, the images playing in my vivid imagination go beyond the beauty of heaven. There are also scenes of the things promised me for here on earth. I see myself standing before huge crowds of people, preaching and prophesying the Word of the Lord during conferences. I see ALL of my family saved and serving the Lord. My husband and I, still Pastoring, however, we are doing it full-time. Our children, all successful, are serving in some capacity of ministry with their spouses. Financially, we are in a great place. Our physical health is good and our spiritual health, even better. We (hubby and I) live in a beautiful condo overseeing an amazing and serene view. We travel together often for ministry as well as leisure. We live a life of, HEAVEN ON EARTH.

I enjoy getting lost in my thoughts. I love to watch the movies in my mind. It is a constant reminder to me of God’s love, mercy and grace. It keeps me wanting more of Him and pushes me to keep pressing in until I see heaven move earth. Trust me, heaven has moved on my behalf several times And I am more than thankful but, I refuse to be satisfied because that would only mean that I don’t believe that the Lord has more for me and wants much more for me. So, for that reason, I will continue to watch the ‘MOVIES IN MY MIND’ and wait on the Lord to do all that He pleases.

 

Speaking Out

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I was shocked to hear about the scrutiny that the president of Chik-Fil-A was undergoing because he spoke what he believed. When asked what he felt about gay marriage, he responded by saying that he believes what the bible says; one man and one woman. This response caused an out cry from those who believe that marriage should not only be between a man and a woman. Now, they are trying to stop the growth of this christian company. However, today, August 1st is the day we show our support for what we (christians) believe, the TRUTH! I made it a point to go and order lunch at Chick-Fil-A and many others are doing the same.

This situation made me stop and think. …….. (To read this post in its entirety please go to my new address, http://www.weightingontheLord.com…..Please continue to follow me at that address.)